All of us have to admit, whether we want to or not, that we’re a product of our environment. And sometimes that environment from decades ago pops up at unexpected times.
My parents both went as far as the eighth grade in school, yet I still count them as two of the smartest people I’ve encountered in life. What they lacked in book-smarts they made up for with what I like to call good, old-fashioned horse-sense.
I never, ever heard either of my parents utter a curse word, but they both had a distinctive vocabulary and slang terms that I heard daily. It’s amazing to me that all these decades later that vocabulary still surfaces occasionally.
Let me explain.
Last weekend my wife Lisa and I went to see the SIU men’s basketball game again Northern Iowa. It was a great game, great energy in the Arena and despite a dreadful final two minutes when the Salukis couldn’t make a free throw and let UNI back in the game, it was an outstanding performance and a 75-73 win. As we sat in our seats waiting for the crowd to clear after the game I made this comment: ‘It was a great game but they ‘dern near’ let it get away at the end.’
Every man reading this will understand the ‘look’ that I got from my wife after I uttered that sentence. First, she wrinkled her forehead, turned her head slightly and then, in the form of a question and with a hint of exasperation in her voice said: ‘Dern near? What … does dern near mean?’
I explained that ‘dern near’ means ‘almost.’ And of course she quickly asked why I hadn’t simply said ‘they almost let it get away at the end.’ It was a question I couldn’t answer. ‘Dern near’ just popped out, was my only explanation.
But, that exchange started me thinking about the colorful language and vocabulary that I grew up hearing daily. The realization that these words that I heard as a kid and still occasionally use as an adult might just vanish someday made me feel old and a little nostalgic.
The following morning, with ‘dern near’ still on my mind I grabbed a pen and paper and started writing down some great old-fashioned slang words that will undoubtedly go the way of the dinosaur someday.
Here’s my partial list:
‘Galavantin’ – This is a word I heard from both parents often during my high school days: ‘You need to get home early, I don’t want you to be out ‘galavantin’ around all night.’ To my parents, ‘galavantin’ meant driving up and down the same streets all night long or standing on a corner with a bunch of other knuckleheads. When I heard the word ‘gallivantin’ I took it as a direct deterrent to me having fun.
‘Tarnation’ – As I mentioned, my dad didn’t curse, so I always took this word to be a replacement for the word ‘hell’ because he often asked me: ‘What in tarnation is wrong with you?’
‘High falutin’ – This word was aimed at somebody putting on airs or giving the assumption that they had a higher status in life than they did.
‘Lollygag’ – Both parents used this word regularly, usually when they were telling me I was not going to ‘lollygag’ around the house all day and be lazy and do nothing.
‘Dilly dallying’ – This phrase was used often when I was trying to stall and get out of some form of work around the house. ‘I’m tire of you dilly dallying around, go get the yard mowed.’
‘Beatenest’ – This was one of the most unique words that they used and I still say it once in a while normally when talking about politicians. ‘That’s the ‘beatenest’ thing I’ve ever seen.’ In other words, it beat anything ever witnessed before.
‘Dad-blame-it’ – This was my dad’s pet word and I’m certain it replaced many expletives. When he said this word, it was time to take a step back. If he ever tossed out ‘dad-blame-it’ back-to-back, it usually didn’t turn out well for me.
‘Dad-gummit’ – This was just a milder form of ‘dad-blame-it’ – used when an incident didn’t require a raised voice.
‘Malarkey’ – Apparently back in that era there were a lot of people full of this because I heard my dad say many times: ‘He’s so full of malarkey it’s not funny.’
‘Well, I’ll swan’ – Used by my mother often to express wonderment or amazement. She would see something happen and then hang onto the first word a long time and say: ‘We-l-l-l-l … I’ll swan!’
‘A lick of gumption’ – Gumption meant common sense and a lick was apparently the smallest measure known to man. ‘That guy doesn’t have a lick of gumption.’
Yes, we are all a product of our environment and looking back and rehashing all these old and glorious slang words makes me realize again that I had it pretty ‘dern’ good.
”God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure” (Ephesians 1:5 NLT).
”When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you” (Isaiah 43:2 NLT). 
